 The Lord your God who goes before you will Himself fight on your behalf, just as He did for you in Egypt before your eyes, and in the wilderness where you saw how the Lord your God carried you, just as a man carries his son, in all the way which you have walked until you came to this place. ~ Deuteronomy 1:30-31 To this place. A place of peace and rest and plenty, according to His riches and grace in Christ Jesus (not mine that I've earned, but His I've been given). I've been carried on His Spirit current...sometimes not knowing where I'll be a month or a week out. But when I know that where I am is where He has led me, it reminds me to trust him for the next step forward. He carries us as a man carries his son. His beloved, cherished, cared for child. Do I deserve to be held in His arms, led by His hand? Not of myself, but that is really beside the point. Always faithful--that's what God is! He is true to himself even when we are not. Not because of who I am, or what I've done, but because of who He is and what He has done! And because I didn't do anything to deserve it, there's not really anything I can do to undeserve it, because it was never about me to begin with. The gift is given. It is my choice each day to receive it, to live in the gift of grace, his mercies new every morning. This morning. In this place. In each place that He brings me to. Then fear creeps in, planting lies of uncertainty in my garden of trust. Lies to choke the growing, rob the sunlight meant to nourish, compete for root space under the surface of our minds, our hearts. Lies that say this place has no future, this place has no meaning for the journey, no fruit worth cultivating to share. But the lies are lies, and their poison must be dug out. Not once a in a while, but regularly keeping our vigil against the unruly impostors. Infuse the soil with truth as a protective barrier! So when I'm home, I trust. When I'm away, I trust. Trusting that this place, too, is a marker on my journey whose destination ultimately lies with Him. My life is hidden with Christ! (Col. 3:3)
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Wise words written by my grandfather on June 5th, 2000.
"To hope is to believe in the possibility, however slim, that things will change. It is to believe that given patience and time one can endure whatever may come before one’s situation improves and that things promised or principles held will eventually prevail. To hope is to trust in the outcome no matter how costly or difficult the way, to hold on to one’s beliefs in spite of all indications to the contrary. Hope is that state of belief that enables all one’s resources to be focused on an outcome deemed impossible by all human odds whether that outcome is fulfilled in one’s lifetime or beyond. Hope transcends time and events. Hope is the catalyst that triggers energy you did not know you had, to do what you didn’t know you could, in situations you never knew you’d face. Hope is the connecting rod between faith and fulfillment. Hope is grounded in the unchanging One who validates our faith in his sovereign will. Hope stands between what we believe and the Eternal God in whom we believe to enable us to love even when there is no earthly reason for us to love."  The first snow of the year has fallen, and, so far, has stayed. The brilliant whiteness adds to seasonal cheer and travel hazards. Love it or hate it, winter is here!
Cold, yet cozy. Beautiful, yet dangerous. Fun...and annoying. The beauty may even prickle to the touch. Metaphor for life? Most of us have picked a favorite season out of the year, if only to have an answer when asked. Each have their pros and cons, and our selfish psyche picks which ones to remember and wishes away the rest. But as there is a "reason for the season" of Christmas (which approaches with astonishing pace!), there is likewise a purpose for each season we encounter in our lives. We know that seasons change, but we do not always have the time or the inclination to prepare for them. Sometimes the change seems to come without warning....and not all the seasons are welcome. While there may be the occasional Indian summer of unexpected happy adventures, more often it seems that the interruption is of a sinister nature: accidents, sickness, unemployment, heartbreak, or the death of a loved one. What do you do with that? Perhaps the most troubling question is: WHY? Why did this happen? (or not happen...) Why did this happen to me? Why did this happen now? Why shouldn't I give up now? Why doesn't it just go away? While those questions may have answers, maybe that's the wrong sort of question for us to be asking at first. Maybe the essence of Why is a distraction, to keep us sitting at the base of the hurdle in our way, analyzing the structure and philosophizing about the placement on the track instead of jumping or climbing over to continue the race. We mean well, of course. If we know Why, then we know what to do about it, right? We would know how to prevent it from happening again, and eventually have a problem-free life. Right? Wrong: "...in this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." (John 16:33) I have several friends who were/are involved in debate clubs growing up. Something they have learned is that if you let your opponent frame the questions for you, or fall into a default mode, you lose the argument. All right, fine. So what questions could we be asking instead? Well, here are some that I use for target practice when I'm "trouble shooting." :-) What is the trouble/s? It is said that identifying the problem is the first step to dealing with it. While not imperative for initial action, understanding the issue is certainly necessary to achieve a long-term resolution of it. And have you noticed that troubles like to travel in company? When I'm feeling overwhelmed, it really helps me to write down a list of all the variables trying to stress me out, so that the nebulous mass doesn't keep churning in the back (or front) or my mind. Then I talk the list over with God. Whom does this affect? Something I have found is that it helps to shift the focus from myself to others. Obviously this is affecting me personally, but while I might feel alone, I'm usually not. Even seemingly isolated troubles often have ripples into other people's lives. What can I do to ease their pain and better understand their burden? Who am I fighting against? Regardless of who or what I think caused the problem, I need to recognize who the enemy really is: Satan. The devil will use whatever he can to distract me and trick me into putting my energy into warring against anything else. But although the symptoms vary with each case, it's hard to go wrong with targeting him as the ultimate perpetrator. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. ~ Ephesians 6:11-12 How has God shown himself strong in the past? I remind myself that God is greater than my trouble/enemy. I read the Bible and find story upon true story of how God has shown his power and grace in strong, effective ways. I search out modern-day testimonies from friends or even strangers that relate to my situation. I review the specific faithfulness and goodness of God in my personal history. When I can't remember certain events well, I try to find someone else who was there that can help me recall it better. It also helps to write down answered prayers in a journal to look back at. How do I fight? Instead of reacting in fear, doubt, hate, worry, griping, or other such destructive manner, I strive to respond with the opposite. These are some tactics in my arsenal:
How can I glorify God through this? There comes a point when how we respond to hardship contributes to answering the Why. When we submit our lives to the Lord Jesus, God works in our lives to bring good out of even the things that Satan meant to destroy us (Romans 8:28). We can partner in this process by keeping our eyes open for opportunities to give glory to God along the way. "Neither this man nor his parents sinned," said Jesus, "but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life." ~ John 9:3 As you may have guessed, this is majorly a distillation of what I am learning from my recent life struggles: nursing my sister when she was suffering from a recurring high fever, dealing with a nasty rash on my own skin, resisting depression after the high of a long film shoot, ongoing car trouble, paying unexpected bills, and being there for friends in a hard place. It's been a hard fall. But God has brought us through as victors, not victims! God has healed us and we experienced a recovery much faster than normal. I've been receiving unexpected gifts and funds that have covered all the expenses, and now have a wonderfully functional vehicle. And despite my many imperfections and inexperience, he has somehow used me to help others through some rough spots at the same time. I am in awe of what he has done—and is still doing! But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. ....All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God. Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. ~ 2 Corinthians 4:7-9, 15-18 Yes, life can be very painful, and often confusing. No, there doesn't seem to be a shortage of inconvenient circumstances cropping up from the infamous land of Nowhere with the unnerving speed of Suddenly. But who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: "For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered." No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. ~ Romans 8:35-39  Seconds of sliding changed weekend plans faster than I'd have thought possible.
We were coming home from set Friday morning after a night of filming on Beyond The Mask. Traffic was dense and there was heavy rainfall. I was driving, and my sister Christy was asleep on the passenger side. I was trying to take it easy, but hydroplaned at a red light and rear-ended the vehicle in front of me, totaling my car. We were both conscious and coherent at the scene. First responders arrived quickly. The other driver was fine; praise God! The set medic and some other production crew members got to the hospital ahead of us and were there to help us through the process. My brother immediately started on his way from VA, and got here Friday evening. Spencer and his mom also came from WI to be with us for a few days. Christy was kept in the emergency unit for observation throughout the night. She sustained multiple rib fractures on her right side, but is doing very well. We are "home" now to where we are currently staying in MI, and are taking it easy. My neck was stiff the next day, but I am uninjured. How thankful we are for God's hand of protection! "What if" thoughts try to sneak in and conjure up alternate scenarios leading up to an outcome without a crash, but I handcuff them to the knowledge of my Christ, my Redeemer. He is my stronghold in the day of trouble (Nahum 1:7). In this world we will have trouble, but take heart! He has overcome the world (John 16:33). You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance. ~ Psalm 32:7 God is so much bigger than any of my mistakes, so much stronger than any evil that can come against us. He even turns what Satan means to destroy us into an instrument of grace in our lives. We are not doomed to a living regret of what-ifs and should'ves and if-onlys. Instead, he gives us a living hope. (1 Peter 1:3) There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off. ~ Proverbs 23:18 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." ~ Jeremiah 29:11 The peace that I have experienced since the accident is hard for me to even comprehend. It is guarding my heart and my mind in Christ Jesus (Phil. 4:7). I have not had a single nightmare, though I remember the incident fairly clearly. I cry sometimes, but it's more healing than hurting. There are definitely times of emotional release, of accepting comfort given, of feeling the stress of watching someone I love be in pain. There are times when I have to actively accept the peace instead of wallowing in "reasonable" condemning, accusatory thought patterns. If I want life and peace I must let my mind be controlled by the Holy Spirit (Romans 8:6) and choose life-giving thoughts. Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you. ~ Philippians 4:8-9 My God gives grace to the humble, strength to the weak, comfort to the broken, healing to the wounded. His love is unfailing, unwavering, undeterred. His glorious presence sustains joy in the middle of any storm. Did you know that in spite of the pain and confusion and tears and smoke and rain and phone calls and exhaustion, within minutes my sister and I had prayed, smiled, cracked a couple of jokes, and prayed again? Being the first time I had experienced this sort of trauma, I have a hunch that this isn't an expected reaction—were it not for the grace of God surrounding us. Thank you all for your rich outpouring of love and prayers for us! We are blessed to have such a wonderfully big "family." Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. ~ Romans 15:13 
People sometimes tell me how strong I am. But I don't feel strong. Whatever strength is there, it surely isn't mine. I guess that would be scriptural: For the foolishness of God is wiser than man’s wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man’s strength. Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. ~ 1 Corinthians 1:25-27 I have been called. Called to live my life in love and joy and peace and patience and faith and kindness and obedience. Called to devote my energies and thoughts and words and actions as a living sacrifice of adoration to the one true God. Called to a steadfast surrender to the astounding Grace that makes it at all possible. Direct me in the path of your commands, for there I find delight. ~ Psalm 119:35 All well and good to be willing to obey, but what if we are unsure of the path to take? What constitutes obedience in a particular instance? It is said that the devil is in the details. Perhaps, but my God is Lord over both the details and the bigger picture, so I'm in the best of hands. This is what the Lord says—your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: “I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go. They did not thirst when he led them through the deserts; he made water flow for them from the rock; he split the rock and water gushed out. ~ Isaiah 48:17, 21 He will teach me, direct me, lead me in the way I should go. But so often I'm like a little kid: "Are we there yet?" and five minutes later "How much LONGer?!!" In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation. ~ Psalm 5:3 As I was growing up my family would sometimes take an entire summer and visit friends and family all across the States. I grew used to lengthy drives and learned to use the time spent in the van productively. Those who were able might decide to nap some in order to arrive with more energy. Reading, studying, talking with parents and siblings, singing songs, playing travel games, folding origami, tatting, crocheting, solving puzzles—there were countless activities available to occupy us (besides the ever-tempting snack-box). Have I so quickly forgotten how to be content as a passenger? Humph. But at least on THOSE trips I knew what to expect! Oh, really? What about traffic delays, adverse weather conditions, construction detours—and my still developing sense of time passage itself? Is this really so different? Many of us are still children with respect to interacting with heaven's timetable. I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning. ~ Psalm 130:5-6 Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.” The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord. ~ Lamentations 3:22-26 A dear friend reminded me yesterday that I am not the only one having to employ patience here. God is being patient, too. Not just patient with me (which he is, and I am SO thankful!), but everything else going on that makes things take longer than they might otherwise. God is excited for me to glimpse the next adventure, thrilled to take me there and share my delight in what he has so graciously prepared. For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. ~ Ephesians 2:10 He is infinitely more eager than I, and infinitely more patient. Anticipation is helpful. Impatience and anger over unmet expectations are not. Do we joyfully trust our Father that the good things he has prepared for us will also come in his beautiful time? I confess that after publishing my last post all about waiting, part of me indulged in the thought that the package I was waiting for (speaking figuratively) would now "magically" appear. Another part of me suspected that there was still much to learn about this fascinating facet of life called "waiting." The former part hoped that the latter part was being unnecessarily pessimistic. I chuckle inside now at my psychological game. Who was I kidding? It is when our own strength runs out that we discover the true strength that comes from depending on God alone. God enjoys spending time with me—me spending time with him. Yes, he will be with me, holding my hand as I walk through the door when that time comes. I even think I know which door that is, though not fully what lies behind it. It hasn't opened yet, though I have knocked several times. Well, that doesn't mean I can't praise God in the hallway! Let's break out the car songs . . . . ;-)  Hail The Lamb
a song by Rebekah Cook Son of God upon a cross Bled for guilt of all mankind Bore the blame and felt the shame Cleansed us for a newborn life Innocence gave recompense Canceled debt that drowned my soul Healing rain dissolved my chains Broke the curse and made me whole Hail the Lamb that was slain Who for our redemption paid Hail the Lamb! Praise his name Through his blood we are saved From each nail a painful trail Mercy flowed to make us free His last breath sealed with his death Grace that reaches even me Sacrifice of greatest price Love made plain upon a tree Of our sin he made an end “It is finished!” was his plea Hail the Lamb that was slain Who for our redemption paid Hail the Lamb! Praise his name Through his blood we are saved Raised to life, now glorified Empty grave proclaims his pow'r He still lives, forgiveness gives All who call this very hour Lost now found, for heaven bound Living hope of which I sing There to be eternally Loving on my Savior King Hail the Lamb that was slain Who for our redemption paid Hail the Lamb! Praise his name Through his blood we are saved  This past week I had the privilege of teaching at a film workshop in Denver, CO, with my brother and sister, who are also heavily involved in the film industry. I spoke about what scheduling looks like, and explained a sample call sheet, but the bulk of what I shared had to do with acting: auditioning, character study, and what it's like on set.
One of the topics that came up was the "cold read." That's a casting term for when an actor is asked to audition with sides (scenes from the script) that they have not previously studied. You haven't had time to warm up for it, so it's called reading it "cold." For acting, the first time I did a cold read was about a year and a half ago. I had studied on how one should approach it, but was still nervous about the actual execution (ominous word, I know, but it captures well the essence of the moment). I had five minutes with the script before I was "on," and the adrenaline from the focused energy made me feel like I'd been running after an active three-year-old for an hour with no breaks. No, it was not comfortable to do. Yes, I was apprehensive. But it was also surprisingly fun! (Especially when they called the next day to offer me the role) As far as my life goes? "Cold read" situations pop up with disconcerting frequency. By God's grace, I have but to ask to receive inside tips and wisdom on how to handle them. There are several keys to keep in mind when faced with a cold read. They are much the same as an ordinary audition. The main difference is being able to snap into a faster gear to prep. Here goes:
God has information about the situation (script) that you don't. He can give you wisdom about how to go about things that will make sense in the actual context—even without you knowing what that context is!
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. ~ Isaiah 41:10 Stress (dismay) isn't going to help anyway. When the thought comes: "I can't do this!", simply agree quickly. "Sure enough, 'I' can't do this. However, there's this other factor to take into account. God is going to help me. That means that not only can I survive this, but I can certainly 'take possession' on top!" Leave your worries with him and enjoy the experience.
The temptation is to dwell on what we don't have to go on. The if-only's can be exhausting! But what DO you have? Start there. God can show you how to use it in unexpected ways. (Go read the rest of the story to find out how the widow used her oil)
For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. ~ 2 Timothy 1:7 Indecision is a fearful stance toward something which you feel in the dark about. The key is to walk in obedience to the light you already have. Be courageous! We do not walk alone. Let your “Yes” be yes, and your “No,” no. Don't waffle between them in the "maybes."
Even if you can't get it word for word, try to understand each point being made. Speak according to the need. Don't just put words out there that won't propel the situation in the right direction. In regard to life's unexpected turns, don't spill out whatever comes to mind to say. Words are powerful! Have an arsenal of faith-building words at the ready in case you need to remind yourself that if God is for you, who can be against you? What you're facing might be new to you, but that is not a good reason for your trust in God to falter. His power and wisdom and love remain unfazed.
~ Psalm 32:8-9 Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.” ~ Isaiah 30:21 Don't get stuck on a certain way to do things. If a yes-no option isn't clear at the outset, or you see a a roadblock ahead on the route you had chosen, feel free to mix it up. Let the Holy Spirit guide you on your way; keep your satellite reception strong for the Gospel Positioning System.
As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust. ~ Psalm 103:12-14 What if the decisions you made weren't the right ones? What if you completely misread the script? What if you stumbled on your lines, or failed to reach that level of emotion you were going for? Let the Director give you his feedback. That's what counts, anyway. Is God not bigger than our mistakes? Of course he is! Let him be your judge, your coach, and your teacher. He understands what we're going through. The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O Lord, endures forever—do not abandon the works of your hands. ~ Psalm 138:8 
Last week we wrapped principal photography on a movie entitled Christmas Grace, produced by Bright Horizon Pictures and Crystal Creek Media. Doing winter scenes in summertime highlighted for me another application of being "prepared in season and out of season." Aside from accepting the physical discomfort of warm clothing in warm weather, there is a certain mental preparation to embrace the switch-up instead of rebelling against it. Seasonal confusion is not exclusive to the film industry. I had plenty of practice growing up in adapting to different situations, many times without much advance notice. I was also blessed with a large family going through it all with me, modeling and training flexibility, patience, and joy under stress. And recently, God is leading me to an greater appreciation of seasons, and the importance of living and trusting Today. God is with us in the storms that roll in and whip the hair in our face until we can't see. God is with us when the fruit that we thought should be ripe is still green with the slightest streaks of color showing. God is with us when the leaves of our dreams start to grow on branches that were bare for months and years. "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens..." ~ Ecclesiastes 3:1 Here is my current version: There is a time to travel and a time to stay home, a time to pack and a time to unpack, a time to junk a car and a time to buy one, a time to stay awake driving and a time to stop and rest, a time to cry and a time to laugh, a time to grieve and a time to twirl around... A time to memorize and a time to improvise, a time to submit an audition and a time to wait for a verdict, a time to wear make-up and a time to wash it off, a time to be "talent" and a time to help as crew, a time to dress a set and a time to tear it down, a time to be outdoors and a time to stay out of the sun... A time to sleep in and a time to get up early, a time to plan ahead and a time to be spontaneous, a time to embrace and a time to step back, a time to socialize and a time to be alone, a time to keep and a time to give away, a time to call and a time to let the other call first... A time to be stubborn and a time to relent, a time to be serious and a time to be goofy, a time to hold up bravely and a time to let down, a time to be silent and a time to share, a time to remember and a time to forget, a time to forgive and a time to be forgiven. All of these seasons I have roller-coastered through in the last month, and/or I am riding them out now. Opportunities to remember the "secret" have abounded. Every moment presents a choice to live fully, joyfully. In spite of scenes that seem out of order, in spite of emotions that threaten to homestead in the suffocating prairie of Worry, in spite of plans made and unmade, choosing to live THIS day that the Lord has made, and be glad in it! No matter what the season, there is a purpose for it. And no matter how the seasons may change, or how slowly or quickly according to our minds: "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever." ~ Hebrews 13:8 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?" ~ Romans 8:28, 31-32 "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." ~ Matthew 6:33-34 "Praise be to the name of God for ever and ever; wisdom and power are his. He changes times and seasons; he sets up kings and deposes them. He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the discerning." ~ Daniel 2:20-21 "Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast." ~ 1 Peter 5:6-10 
My faith muscles are feeling sore lately. That's a good thing. It means they've been used, and are in the process of getting stronger! I'm doing my best to keep my spiritual protein (challenging and encouraging scriptures) intake high so those muscles have something to build with.
This chapter in my life, as with many, has involved a great deal of travel. One of the advantages of spending copious amounts of time behind the wheel is that I get to listen to music to keep awake. My car is from a decade that used cassettes, so I have a stash of oldy-goldy tapes to mix in with more recent MP3s (via an adapter). Here are some songs that have been a deep encouragement over the last weeks: "Uncharted Territory" ~ Rachael Lampa (2011) Verse 1: So unlike me, what's going on I'm usually not the one To be afraid, hesitate Second guess what I've done Am I over-thinking it, complicating it Should I let go and let it be Chorus: Never done this before how am I supposed to know where to go from here No prescription, no rules, no direction, no signs that will make it clear Like the first man on the moon, Columbus 1492 Like baby steps, and babies don't worry, so why should I Uncharted territory Uncharted territory Verse 2: Sort of unprepared, just a little scared Say go get it girl, grab a hold of it Look inside myself, find buried deep Patience; don't give up on me Am I over-thinking it, complicating it All I gotta do is do it "The Plan" ~ Steve Green (1998) Chorus: I don't need to have the plan in hand I don't need to have the end in sight All I need to do is follow you, wherever you lead And do what you ask me to Verse 1: Trusting you, Lord, with all my heart Following you all my days Whether I can or can't understand I'll acknowledge you in all my ways Verse 2: Though I am pressed on every side I am not in despair My faith in you will carry me through Though I may not see where You're leading me "Crazy" ~ Mercy Me (2002) Verse 1: Why I would I spend my life longing for the day that it would end Why would I spend my time pointing to another man Isn't that crazy How can I find hope in dying, with promises unseen How can I learn your way is better in everything I'm taught to be Isn't that crazy Chorus: I have not been called to the wisdom of this world But to a God who's calling out to me And even though the world may think I'm losing touch with reality It would be crazy To choose this world over eternity Verse 2: And if I boast let me boast of filthy rags made clean And if I glory let me glory in my Savior's suffering Isn't that crazy And as I live this daily life I trust you for everything And I will only take a step when I feel You leading me Isn't that crazy Chorus: I have not been called to the wisdom of this world But to a God who is calling out to me And even though the world my think I'm losing touch with reality It would be crazy To choose this world over eternity You can call me crazy... :-)  What do you think? Yes? No? It depends?
In theory, we intellectually assent to the faithfulness of God, his goodness, his love for us. In practice, many of us hold inherent in the meaning of blindness, or not seeing yet, an uncertainty and fear of what might or might not happen. Can we call this faith? It would seem that we have confused ourselves about the nature of trust. Trust is an "assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something." (Merriam Webster) So, really, it's only a blind trust if we have not grown acquainted with the person or thing in which we have placed our trust. It is through the knowing that trust grows. Our trust is MEANT to grow. As we learn to know and "see" the source and foundation of our trust, it won't shake us up to not see the rest. Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. This is what the ancients were commended for. And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him. ~ Hebrews 11:1-2, 6 Trust grows as we deepen our relationship with him, grow our knowing him. That is where the assured part comes in. First we take a step of reliance, then it is assured by experiencing the evidence of God's unchanging integrity and the dependability of his promises. We come to trust him! When we let fears and uncertainties bring thoughts into our minds of doubt, we need to fight back with what we know about God and his unfailing love. He is so worthy of our trust. If our trust in God feels blind (in the sense that the "not seeing" engenders fear), could it be that we simply do not know his character (Jeremiah 9:24)? His infinite ability and strength? Know that he is the very essence of truth (John 14:6; 18:37)? That he is by definition love (1 John 4:16)? That he has given all that he has to make us members of his own family—we who have no ability in ourselves to become worthy or deserving of this marvelous mercy? "So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." ~ Matthew 6:31-34 What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. ...I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. ~ Romans 8:31-34, 38-39 He who provided a steady miraculous flow of oil from the widow's jug and flour from her jar (1 Kings 17), who made ravens carry meat to satisfy a prophet's hunger in time of famine (1 Kings 17), who floated an ax-head to repay a loan (2 Kings 6)—how will he not also supply my every need? For I know whom I have believed (2 Timothy 1:12), and he is ever faithful. Yes, even in spite of me! "...if we are faithless, he will remain faithful, for he cannot disown himself. ~ 2 Timothy 2:13 As a good friend of mine says, "it's great to know that God's provision doesn't depend on our ability to worry about the future." It is not as if we have to get in "x" days of worrying before handing it over to God, to ensure that he knows exactly how important our problem is. We can give up our cares, worries, and stress to him right away, because he already cares. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. ~ Philippians 4:6-7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. (1 Peter 5:7) To cultivate an unshakable trust we must grow in our knowing of God's:
Don't just take somebody's word for it, not even mine! Your God-trust will be much stronger if you go directly to the source yourself. The Bereans had a great habit: "...they received the word with all eagerness, examining the Scriptures daily to see if these things were so." (Acts 17:11) Feel free to leave a comment! I'd love to hear your thoughts on the matter. :-) |
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